Family Vacation With Teenagers: A Survival Guide For Parents
By Teresa Ambord
Most parents will admit that living with teenagers can be a challenge under the best of circumstances. Between their struggle to be independent from their parents and the raging hormones wreaking havoc in their bodies, teenagers can be sullen, moody, and lethargic, especially with the family. And they can bounce between being full of energy and being totally listless.
Now take all that unpredictable behavior, stick it in the back of the van with a couple of siblings and a parent or two up front, and take off in search of a fun-filled relaxing family vacation. Sound like a recipe for disaster? Maybe. Here are some tips.
Before You Leave
- Keep your expectations low. That's not negative. It's realistic.
- Schedule your vacation with flexibility if possible. Your teen may be looking forward to a summer job, or a special event with friends.
- Involve the teens in the vacation plans. They constantly strive for more control over their lives. Give them some by letting them help with some simple decisions.
- Give them a little spending money ahead of time, and they are less likely to pester you at every gas stop. But set a limit so they know that if they blow their fortune buying plastic souvenirs at the mini-mart on the way, they won't have spending money later.
In the Car
- Have them take along a portable CD, headset, their favorite music, and lots of batteries. They can zone out when they want to and save the arguments when Mom and Dad want to listen to the oldies station.
- Audio books can be a big hit when traveling, provided you choose one that can capture the attention of both the parents and teenagers.
- Take a cell phone with a prepaid long distance card. The teenagers can reconnect with their friends, plus it gives them a chance to complain about you to someone other than you.
- Keep a cooler loaded with plenty of drinks and easy-to-grab snacks. If your teen is always hungry, a cooler can avoid a world of crankiness.
- Give them a map and ask them to track your progress so they feel invested in the trip, and won't keep asking "how much farther?"
- Stick a Mad Libs pad in the glove box.
The Destination
- Kids often do well at resorts where they might find other kids and a variety of choices. A pool can be a big plus if your teen is a stronger swimmer or if there's a lifeguard on duty.
- If you can afford it, let the teenager bring a friend along so they've got built-in companionship.
- Budget permitting, ask for adjoining rooms and let the teens have their own space. That will save arguments about bedtimes, housekeeping, and TV choices.
- Let them stay up late once in a while, and then sleep in the next day.
- Allow them to walk to nearby stores. It gives them a break from you and vice versa.
- See if there is a cyber-cafe nearby where your teen can spend time emailing his/her friends so they feel connected.
For Your Sanity
And don't forget to work out some time when you can cease being parents, at least for a little while, and just be people. For your sanity sake, you need a break from being mom or dad. After all, it's your vacation too.
